Anita Gosch Esplin was born on December 18,1932 in New York City to Siegfried and Mary Gosch. Although she loved living in Utah most of her life, she always considered herself a New Yorker, and was proud to be from the East Coast. In her early twenties, she came west to attend BYU, and later took a job in Salt Lake City with New York Life where she had a successful career and traveled all over the West Coast on business.

In 1963, Anita was waiting to meet a date at an LDS chapel in Salt Lake City, but the date stood her up. Disgusted, she called a friend for a ride home. As Anita waited again, Don Esplin happened to walk out of a meeting at the chapel. Don introduced himself, and the two of them were married in the Salt Lake Temple on April 28,1964. She was always grateful that her original date stood her up and chuckled about that story for years. Later, when children didn't come as they had hoped, Don and Anita made the decision to adopt, and welcomed two children into their family - John Derek and Anita Marie (AJ).

Having grown up in the quietness of being an only child, Anita was always happiest when her home was full of children from the neighborhood, weekend house guests, or a friend just stopping by. She always had an open-door policy. Many times over the years I came home to find her sitting in the living room, listening to one of her friends, or even my friends, who each appreciated her advice and listening ear. She always made time for people and kept every confidence. When we were in college, she was more than happy to let our friends come over and use her washer and dryer, or even help themselves to leftovers in the fridge at all hours. She always seemed happiest when she had a house full of friends and company.

Over the years, countless extra plates were set at the dining room table, most times without much prior notice, but she never seemed to mind. I think she automatically doubled most recipes just in case someone dropped by. I will always have fond memories of walking through the front door and finding the house filled with delicious smells coming from the kitchen. She was an accomplished and adventurous chef. I can't even imagine the amount of groceries she must have lugged home from the grocery store! For many years, she would only go shopping completely dressed up. She was a stickler about manners, and if we were going out to dinner it meant we'd better be on our very, very best behavior. No exceptions or negotiations!

Because she was such an incredible baker, our friends would stop by almost daily on the way home from East Elementary, knowing there were probably fresh cookies in Anita's kitchen. Brad Esplin once brought an empty plastic bag home to his mother Grace and told her to make the same kind of cookies that had been inside the plastic bag. The cookies had simply been too good . . . he couldn't make it all the way home without finishing every last cookie on the way! Grace told him she would call Anita for the recipe, but Brad believed she should be able to simply smell the bag and figure out the chocolate chip cookie recipe. From then on, Grace called Anita's cookies "Smell Cookies," the best cookies ever! (The secret was crushed corn flakes.) And rarely did Anita bake without a Johnny Mathis or Jim Croce LP playing in the background. She loved music, and always preferred vinyl records to anything else.

Anita kept her word about everything, from what time she would pick her kids or her mother up, to remembering any commitment or church assignment. Punctuality was something for which she was always known. Even a long list of pets over the years got breakfast and dinner at the same time every single day. She had happy, happy pets, from dogs to cats. And no matter what was going on in the world, be it wars, disasters or any other sort of bad news, family dinner was served with everyone around the table promptly at 6 pm, every night. Exceptions or no-shows were frowned on, and besides, who wanted to miss one of Anita's great dinners?!

I will always remember my mother's compassion and concern for others. Once, while driving home from the Market Basket on an extremely hot afternoon in the early 70's, she saw an elderly woman struggling as she carried a bag of groceries down the street. We stopped, offered her a ride, and I watched my mother not only gently help her into the car, but then carry the groceries into her home and unpack them all. She never looked the other way if someone needed help, be it a person or stray animal. We can easily recall countless similar incidents of kindness and reaching out throughout her life.

Anita was immensely aware of the gift of neighbors, and although she and Don had planned to build a home in Bloomington when it was first developed, they opted to stay put in their home on 400 South, mainly because of the unique attachment she had to our great neighbors. In particular, the Foremasters, the Stocks, the Harrisons, the Labrums, and the Jones families. Even as they continued to look at other homes in newer developments, she could never convince herself that leaving the neighbors she loved was actually the best idea. When they decided to add-on to their existing home instead, the final design involved cutting down a tree that housed our beloved treehouse. Ultimately, Anita made the decision that the meticulously planned addition could be significantly downsized, and that the treehouse could stay. That generous decision made her a hero in my 7-year-old eyes. I know that many times she missed the extra space planned in the larger addition, but she never said it out loud, and the treehouse is still there.

When she became an empty-nester, and her last child was leaving home, she stood in the driveway as a car was loaded up, tears running down her face. She said that she knew that the house would simply be far too quiet now, and that the steady stream of visitors would stop. How in the world would she ever cook for just two? After that, she always encouraged us to bring friends back home with us, and for years and years she continued to ask about Rob Sorenson, Chris Leishman, Jeff Sandstrom, Joelle Nelson, Brad Esplin and Lisa Belliston, a group of six she always considered her "other" kids.

Throughout their marriage, Don and Anita lived and had homes in Salt Lake City, Palo Alto and Mountain View California, but ultimately landed in St. George. Anita kept in touch with friends from each location. Friends were that important to her, and many handwritten cards were sent all over the country over the years. Some of the friends she was particularly grateful for include Coleen Stock, Linda Page, Laree Jones, Marlene Larkin, Janet Labrum, Joyce Oleson, and a college roommate, Judy. She was also very fond of Lynn Ericksen, Dale Larkin, Dixie Andrus, Ruth Esplin, Marilyn Thueson, Ruth McDonald, Max Rose, Brad Eitner, Verus Barlow, Joanne Grimm, Leila Sullivan, Larry Spitler, John Boccardo, Mike Thueson, Karen Reber and Stephanie Carter. She was a keen observer of people, and spoke of her appreciation and admiration over many years for these individuals.

Anita loved to drive and was devastated when her eyesight became too bad for her to renew her driver's license. She had always been an excellent driver and personally taught me how to drive a stick shift. There was never a family road trip where she didn't map out "the back way" through the country, or make sure we stopped at out-of-the-way monuments, historic sights, or favorite restaurants. She especially loved impromptu picnics, frozen yogurt, driving a clean and shiny car, the Veyo tomatoes that Heber and Laree Jones shared regularly, dinner at Little America Hotel in Salt Lake City, the movie North By Northwest, studying architecture and home design, a fresh maple bar from Harmons, listening to anyone play the piano, and any vacation to Southern or Northern California that involved the beach or touring early California Catholic Missions. She especially enjoyed listening to the Melody Moms, led by Doris Webb. She also loved her part-time job in the office at Wilkinson Electric, which she was very sad to leave. She was crazy about the Grand Canyon, and we made trips to the Lodge at the North Rim many times for a late lunch overlooking the canyon. This was one of her very favorite Southern Utah road trips.

She loved to sew, especially with Ila Jean Esplin, a favorite sister-in-law she always loved spending time with. They made the very best stuffed animals as a team when we were kids. Anita never saw a dog or a cat she didn't want to greet and hold, made amazing Sunday dinners, and baked homemade rolls which seem impossible to replicate. She loved American history, and always wished she could have quietly sat in on Heber Jones's history classes at Dixie High School. And my favorite thing of all is that she read to us literally all the time when we were kids. She regularly took us to the children's area downstairs in the original St. George library to check out books, which remains for me one of most memorable spots in all of 1970's St. George.

Anita was very aware of caring for the environment, and was recycling, composting and skipping the dryer and hanging clothes out on sunny days 40 years back. I'll never forget the smell of getting into a bed with clean, cool sheets that had hung outside in the sun. Thanks for that extra effort, Mom!

Anita was very aware of anyone that felt alone, left out, bullied or disadvantaged. She found unique ways to reach out to anyone -- adult, child, senior or teenager -- whom she believed might need her special brand of support and encouragement. She would often deliver a freshly baked hot peach cobbler or one of her famous plum cakes, or pick up extra groceries to take to someone in need. She always seemed to know just how to help. She taught us there was always another side to a story that perhaps we didn't understand, and that we should never be too quick to judge any person or situation. She believed that being kind in every association in life was what mattered most, even when it was difficult. I never saw her stray from that belief, even in times when she was frustrated or down.

Anita suffered in private with severe anxiety for many years. It was very debilitating for her. As travel became too stressful, she turned instead to following the travels of family and friends and kept a giant atlas on the dining room table. She loved maps and would keep up with the travels of friends and family both stateside and abroad, hoping for postcards, or later, emails with photos.

As her eyesight failed, she relied on others to describe the changing seasons, or to make the cookie recipes she could no longer make herself. Special thanks to Ann Horlacher, who spent years helping Don and Anita, particularly with meals and companionship. And special thanks to Martha, who kept Don and Anita's home spotless after she could no longer do it herself.

In her last weeks here, Anita was surrounded by an amazing group. Enormous gratitude goes to Deidre Buck, Mindi Larkin Albrecht, Mary Leichty, Anita Marie Haven, Gary and Kathleen Mitchell, Larry Spitler, John Boccardo, Brad Esplin, Kurtis and Laura Cook, Lana Larkin, the Horlacher Family, Joanne Grimm, Canyon's Hospice and Dr. Michael Codiga. This incredible team, beautifully led by Deidre Buck, kept her laughing, well-fed, and continually occupied. They placed a big Christmas tree right where she could see it twinkle and provided her with an almost unbelievable amount of kindness and care.

Anita did things on her own terms, and in her own way, particularly in her passing. Shortly before she passed, she was able to have a reunion with Don, who had recently been in a skilled nursing facility. He was able to visit her for an entire weekend. They were very happy to be together again, after an illness he was recovering from. There are others who were there in the last few months, perhaps too many to list here, but trust me - Anita truly appreciated every single visit or kind assistance.

Anita especially loved Christmas and was able to spend her last one at home, surrounded by all the smells and sounds of the season. The hustle and bustle of the household around her was really her happy place. There may have also been a few coconut cream pies from Veyo Pies, and some of Lana Larkin's famous Christmas fudge involved in her holiday happiness. She savored every single bite.

Many years ago, Anita made a very personal decision to not have any service after her passing, which we have respected. However, in her memory, if you have a family member who suffers with anxiety, talk openly with them. Be there for them. Also, talk openly about adoption, and consider that option if children don't arrive as you had planned. When you see someone who needs your help, find a real way to help, rather than simply looking the other way.

And most importantly, always be prepared to set another plate at the table. Nothing is better than memories of meals shared with family and friends, and perhaps a couple of Schnauzers who hope a scrap will drop their way. Despite some of the challenges Anita struggled with, the one thing that always seemed to make everything feel better for her was time spent around the dining room table with family and friends, sharing a great meal. Actually, it made everyone feel better. I highly recommend it.